Imagine you're me...imagine you're sitting in your first class (awful, more on that later). Now imagine your phone goes off with a text message, the message says:
"So u wil never go back out wit me cause im ugly and u hate me"
Would you think what I thought?
Cause I thought, "Holy shit my ex-girlfriend is a psychopath..."
Here's the first problem with the above message, I never hated her. Was I annoyed that she dumped me (Yes, if you've forgotten or were never here for the drama, she dumped me
) once she figured out I was only using her for sex? Yes. Was I disappointed that I wouldn't be able to fuck her anymore? Yes, but I wouldn't say I ever hated her. It was pretty clear she and her psycho friend hated me for a while, but I wouldn't say I ever hated her.
The second thing wrong is that god-awful excuse for a language.
Here's the third thing wrong...
Either she still remembers my cell phone number from four and a half years ago because she's a psychopath
She still has my cell phone number in her phonebook...because she's a fucking psychopath.
Now, I will say this, I can only assume that the message is from her. The phone number was one I've never seen before, and no one else would say anything like that to me.
Anyway, speaking of class. I wish wish wish wish wish that I was taking Comm101 with Sean. Instead I have Barbara Villandry AGAIN! Now, I have nothing against Barbara, she's a marvelous woman, but I have no idea how she became chair of the communications department at Hesser. She's so technically inept it's STAGGERING.
Thursday night we watched "Wag the Dog", good movie, by the way. First off she asked me up before class started to make sure we could play the movie without the remote, which we could cause there was no menu, the DVD went right into the movie. So it gets to the opening logos and I pause it. We start class, she gives a little spiel, then asks me how to make it play. Not really a big deal, I tell her to push the play button, and tell her with button it is on the front of the DVD player.
We watch part of the movie and she says, "Can we stop it now, so we can talk about it?"
I say, "Yeah, just push that same button," which she does, and we chat a bit.
"And the same button makes it go again?" I confirm that, indeed, the play button will make it play again, and she says, "Wow, I didn't know you could do that with DVDs!"
She reads out of the book and gets words wrong (chair of the COMMUNICATIONS department), she seems to have a VERRRRY basic grasp of computers and the internet. In a previous class (the last day of Public Relations when no one showed up) she asked me to explain to her wireless internet and how she could get it in her computer. Whenever she can't come up with the information she's looking for in the depths of her mind she says, "Help me here..." I'd guess that, on average, she says it about 15 times per class. After class tonight she came up to me in the hall and tried to get me to set up reciept notification on her email. I told her I had no idea what that was or how to set it up, which is only a half-lie, so she'd go away. I hate being the smart one.
Speaking of being the smart one I was accosted by Alvin, another Hesser idiot who's been in all my classes with Sean so far. This is the dude that hates my buddy Nick for opening his mouth too much and asking stupid questions, when all Alvin does in class is open his mouth and ask stupid question and make comments to nobody. Even Sean gets annoyed with him at times. Anyway, Alvin cornered me on the stairs to ask me if he did his first project right. Why he was asking ME this as opposed to, I dunno, our TEACHER, I have no idea, but he was. Not only that but he wouldn't believe me when I told him that it seemed like he did it right.
Speaking of the first project in Sean's class, I didn't get to Jim Jeanotte because it seems that no one at New Hampshire Public Television checks their mail during the weekend. Oh well, I called WOKQ on Monday afternoon and interview a very nice woman who was extremely gracious and helpful.
In other news...
What is it about young children that makes adults act like morons? And, yes, I am guilty of this myself. What is it about kids under the age of, say, six that just turn normally mature adults into waving, cooing, baby-talking fools?
I had to go to Manchester Boston Regional Airport today to take my security clearance seminar so that I can go there in February and walk around for a day getting people to do surveys. Joy.
After classes I went and hung out with Malcolm and his roommates for a while, we watched half of the daily show, the colbert report, and lewis black's red white and screwed, all the while talking about other stand up comics we loved, and then I left at one, and here I am.
RING ANNOUNCING DEBUT ON FRIDAY, PLEASE COME OUT :D